Eliminating the Inner Voice that’s Foe and not Friend
“I can’t do it…I’m not good enough.”
“I’m not pretty or handsome enough.”
 “I’m just not smart enough....”
 
We’ve all heard conversations like these in our own heads. They’re the voices that stop you from applying for your dream job, asking that cute guy or girl out for a coffee, and quite simply pursuing the life you truly want. Regardless of the many labels for these self-limiting conversations such as “head trash”, “inner critic”, “saboteurs”, or “gremlins”, this negative chatter can be defined according to The Coaches Training Institute as a concept used to name your thought processes and feelings that work to keep you from moving your life forward or deepening your learning process.
 
The analogy I like to use when explaining head trash and gremlins is of a bus; imagine the bus is your life and if you are not aware, your gremlins could be driving the bus (your life) and you are bound and gagged in the back of the bus. You become only the back-seat driver to your own life. As we heighten our self awareness we notice these thoughts and are able to take back control and get in the driver’s seat of the bus and live the life we are meant to be living.
 
Diagnosing the ‘Foe Inner Voice’
The reason why head trash can be powerful and debilitating is because it often goes unnoticed. Negative thoughts permeate our decisions regularly and we are unaware of its existence or the damage it causes. Start paying attention to your thoughts and notice the quality. Is there a tape recorder playing the same story over and over again in your head? How much of what you are thinking is about the past, present, or future? Are these thoughts negative or positive about you, others, and situations?
 
Creating a visual of this voice can be a very powerful tool. Start by asking what does your gremlin look like? What does it wear? What are its favourite sayings? Why does it think it is so important to your life? Go as far as giving it a name so you can acknowledge it when it appears.
 
Saying Goodbye to the ‘Foe Inner Voice’
The truth is that for most of us our gremlins are always there but the voices can get quieter and take up less space as we practice the art of “noticing”. Simply being aware of your self-limiting thoughts can be enough to “suspend” this noise. Get curious…when that gremlin shows up again, ask; what’s triggered it? Where am I? Who am I with? What’s the dialogue? Get to know your inner critic! Suspension is being able to observe your thoughts as they are happening and then to consciously choose to continue with the gremlin thoughts or to think about something else.
 
At the end of the day we all want to be in the drivers’ seat. The most important work we can do is to be honest with ourselves with the answers to these questions. From there, practicing the above tips of noticing, creating a visual and then choosing our thoughts will move us forward.
 
You are good enough, beautiful enough, and smart enough to lead the life you have always wanted. The only thing standing in your way is your gremlin. Now go get em’!